157 Paranoia Questions: Game, Instructions, and a Virtual Coin

Funny paranoia questions

Start with the ridiculous stuff. You probably already have someone in mind.

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Who would get into an argument with a psychic about their future?
Who would thank an automatic door?
Who would spend twenty minutes avoiding a two-minute phone call?
Who would buy a portrait at a thrift store and claim it was one of their ancestors?
Who would spend an inheritance on a dinosaur skeleton?
Who would enter a talent show without deciding what their talent was?
Who would get in line before finding out what it was for?
Who would rehearse a surprised face before opening a present?
Who would buy matching storage boxes before deciding what to put in them?
Who would keep a chair nobody was allowed to sit on?
Who would turn a paper napkin into a diagram to settle an argument?
Who would measure a room by lying down on the floor?
Who would start negotiating the bill before anyone had ordered?
Who would check the dessert menu before agreeing on a place to meet for coffee?
Who would make a seating plan for a picnic with three people?
Who would cover up a working doorbell with a sign asking visitors make a loud doorbell sound?
Who would turn a compliment about their jacket into its entire purchase history?
Who would send a calendar invite for something that was supposed to be spontaneous?
Who would mute a group chat and then ask everyone for updates?
Who would type “quick question” before sending three paragraphs?
Who would say "you too" after being wished a happy birthday?
Who would try to straighten a rug while standing on it?
Who would ask a restaurant where they bought the hand soap?
Who would check an apartment's water pressure at a housewarming party?
Who would choose a shopping cart based on how well it corners?
Who would give a pep talk to a printer?
Who would make a group food order harder by saying they’ll have anything?
Who would insist the floor was more comfortable than the sofa?
Who is most likely to make a joke at the absolute worst moment?
Who would ask to have their ashes put in a snow globe?
Who would race to nab the master bedroom in a shared vacation rental?
Who would learn ventriloquism just to make people uncomfortable?
Who would choose a terrible job because they loved the uniform?
Who would agree to be stuffed and displayed in a museum after they died?
Who would spend a year learning a language so they could eavesdrop on their neighbors?
Who would buy the creepy haunted doll and give it as a gift?
Who would cheer for the villain and have a pretty good argument for it?
Who would ask you to keep taking photos while the police arrested them?
Who would pay to have a building named after them, even if it was a public toilet?
Who would put a photo of themselves in a picture frame at a store?
Who would make their family follow a treasure map to find their inheritance?
Who would try to start a slow clap and keep going when nobody joined in?
Who would pretend to be asleep so two people would keep arguing in front of them?
Who is most likely to fist bump a high five or vice versa?
Who would ask for a refund for girl scout cookies?
Who would turn up to a costume party dressed as something so obscure no one would get it?
Who would volunteer to be hypnotized and fake it when nothing happened?
Who would teach a parrot something rude and then deny responsibility?
Who would ask someone to repeat an insult so they could use it later?
Who would miss their flight because they were too invested in a couple breaking up at the gate?
Who would get kicked out of a cult for trying to take over?
Who is most likely to call you in the middle of the night asking you to bail them out of jail?
Who would hire an actor to play their partner at a high school reunion?
Who would put a fake name on a restaurant waiting list just to hear someone shout it?
Who would buy a billboard to win an argument?
Who would start yelling at the audience as they are booed off stage?
Who would accuse a child of cheating at a game when they lost?
Who could talk a scammer into giving them money?

Personal4

Who would insist they were over something while continuing to bring it up over the course of weeks?
Who would make everyone change bars because the lighting was unflattering?
Who would announce “one more round” while everyone was putting their coats on?
Who would take a dump in a showroom toilet?

Paranoia questions for friends

For the people whose bad habits you know by heart. There are a few good habits in here too.

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Who would understand a whole conversation conducted with eyebrow movements?
Who would rearrange your fridge while looking for a drink?
Who would make you laugh by repeating one completely ordinary word?
Who would move the furniture to act out a story?

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Who would become friends with your parents and start making plans without you?
Who would go along with your plan just to see how spectacularly it failed?
Who would lend you money and forget about it before you did?
Who would bring food to a potluck and ask to be paid back?
Who would bring a backup dessert because they didn't trust the guest bringing dessert?
Who would feel so comfortable at someone else's house that they'd answer the door?
Who would argue for something they didn't believe just to see if they could win?
Who would donate a kidney to someone they couldn't stand if they were a match?
Who would stop an argument to check if the other person had eaten?
Who would leave their own birthday party for a better party?
Whose retirement party would the police have to break up?
Who would turn themselves in for committing a crime they felt guilty about?
Who would be better at being famous than being rich?
Who would drive three hours just to bring you a spare key?
Who could get a whole train car singing?
Who would let you blame them for something they hadn't done?
Who would let you stay with them without asking why you couldn't go home?
Whose parents would be the least surprised to see them on the news?
Who would you trust to pretend to be your boss on the phone?
Who would deny saying something while watching a video of themselves saying it?
Who would keep arguing after the other person admitted they were wrong?
Whose autobiography would need a fact-checker on every page?
Who would choose to spend a night in jail rather than apologize to someone they hated?
Who would adopt the ugliest animal at the shelter because they were worried nobody else would?
Who would squat at a vacation home if they needed a place to stay?
Who would let you tattoo them if you said you needed the practice?
Who would make friends with the person towing their car?
Who would be the most fun to haunt?
Who would start a rumor about themselves to see how long it took to get back to them?
If you were put on trial, who is the person you would least like to speak as a character witness?
Who could win over someone who came to the party determined to hate them?
Who is most likely to become famous and pretend they don't know any of us?

Juicy paranoia questions

Crushes, flirting and questionable dating decisions. For groups that want to get personal.

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Who here could make an argument feel like flirting?
Who would flirt for fun and panic when someone flirted back?
Who would you take as a plus-one if your ex would be there?
Whose dating history would you most like to hear from the other side?
Who could talk you into a second date after a disastrous first one?
Who would you trust to plan a date without telling you where?
Who would you take on a date that involved no talking?
Who would send a post-date text before leaving the parking lot?
Who would choose a first-date restaurant because the exits were convenient?
Who would enjoy a date more after the fancy restaurant lost their booking?
Who would negotiate the date's end time before agreeing to meet?
Who would become friends with their ex's new partner?
Who would miss their ex's family more than their ex?
Who would give an ex dating advice and then hate that it worked?
Who would become suspicious if a date agreed with every opinion they had?
Who would encourage a friend to ask someone out, then realize they liked the same person?
Who would take it personally if a date didn't like their favorite restaurant?
Who would send a perfectly good flirty text, then ruin it with three follow-ups?
Who would book a vacation together before discussing whether they were exclusive?
Who would develop a crush while watching someone reverse a trailer?
Who would invite a crush over to help them put together furniture?
Who would care more about a date's taste in music than their manners?
Who would advise against dating someone exactly like themselves?
Who would get jealous after being the one to say, "Let's just be friends"?
Who would negotiate custody of a favorite café after a breakup?
Whose idea of a romantic surprise would require signing a waiver?
Who would flirt with someone using an accent they couldn't keep up for a whole evening?
Who would realize they were at the wrong wedding but still hang out and go home with someone they met there?
Who would bring their parents along to help them break up with someone?

Adult paranoia questions

Sex, hookups and bedroom habits.

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Show 30 adult questions 18+

Who would ruin their own dirty talk by explaining what they meant?
Who would be more nervous about staying for breakfast than staying for sex?
Who would interrupt bedroom role-play to ask whether their character had a backstory?
Who would sing along to their sex playlist?
Who would laugh halfway through saying something filthy?
Who would sound more convincing talking dirty in a text than out loud?
Who would ask for what they wanted in bed but struggle to ask for an extra pillow?
Who would take "That was amazing" as an invitation to ask for detailed feedback?
Who would explain a sexual preference using a food analogy that made everything less clear?
Who would leave after a hookup because their own pillow was better?
Who would be more upset about a forgotten hoodie than a hookup not texting back?
Who would start sexting and end up discussing philosophy?
Who would reply to a sext with a serious request for clarification?
Who would not send a nude photo because of the laundry in the background?
Who would fold their clothes neatly after taking them off for sex?
Who would have their most serious conversation of the week naked?
Who would write an extremely detailed sex-toy review?
Who would pack a sex toy for a weekend away but forget their toothbrush?
Who would be more intimidated by a sex toy's app than by the toy itself?
Who would be bossy about exactly how they wanted to be bossed around in bed?
Who would be embarrassed watching a sex scene with someone they'd already had sex with?
Who would try to get a hookup to pay half the hotel bill the next morning?
Who would put their sex toys through the dishwasher and forget to empty it before having guests?
Who would keep a sex toy after the breakup because they'd paid for it?
Who would go to an orgy and spend the whole night talking to one person?
Who would have an affair and end up becoming friends with the spouse?
Who is most likely to give a hookup a silly nickname and then forget their actual name?
Who would recognize a porn star at the grocery store and ask them for a selfie?
Who would be most likely to have sex with a clone of themselves?
Who would receive a nude and point out the mess behind the person?

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How to play

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Whisper. Read a question privately, then whisper it to the person on your left.
Name someone. The listener says one other player's name aloud. Keep the question secret.
Flip. Heads: read the question aloud. Tails: keep it secret. You can still tap Question to reveal it if your group agrees.
Pass the turn. The listener asks next, even if they named someone else.

Anyone can skip. Share one phone or use your own phones. Each phone runs its own game, so different phones may show the same question.

Walk me through a round

More about the game

Who asks the next question?

The person who answered asks next. If Alex whispers to Sam and Sam says “Jo,” Sam takes the next turn. Jo does not take over because their name was said.

Can we reveal the question after tails?

Tails means keep it secret in this version. If your group agrees to reveal it anyway, tap Question. The coin result stays the same.

Can we add our own questions?

Yes. In the game, choose My Paranoia list from the Question set menu. Put one question on each line, then choose random or in order. The list saves in that browser; it does not sync to other phones.

What makes a good Paranoia question?

Use a question that someone can answer with another player's name. A specific habit or unlikely situation gives the group more to react to than a broad label like “the funniest.” Save the explanation until the question is revealed.

Paranoia Questions

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Personal · 4

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