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The original 21 questions
Here is our list of questions for the 21 Questions game. I hope you enjoy them!
1. What is the TLDR version of your life?
This question will help you understand what they think is important. If their answer gets included in the highlight reel of their life so far, it must be pretty important to how they see themselves and their place in the world.
2. What should they teach in school, but don’t?
They might answer a couple of different ways on this one. Is it a subject they feel is often neglected? Is it a set of controversial beliefs or facts that they feel get left out? Perhaps it's the more practical skills that get overlooked? You'll learn a little more about how they view the world after this question.
3. What inscription do you want on your gravestone?
While some of the other questions focus on what has happened in the past, this question lets you know how they want their future to play out. When they look back on their life, what do they want to have accomplished?
4. What is a cause that is worth dedicating your life to?
What are they passionate about? What do they think is most important? This question will help you figure out the answer to these questions and more.
5. What should parents stop teaching their children?
Depending on where the person is in their life, you might find out what they didn't like about their parents or perhaps you'll get a glimpse into the type of parent they would like to be.
6. Is it okay to sacrifice one life to save ten?
This is straight up an ethics question. You can see how close you both are in your ethical beliefs.
If you said yes, would you change your answer if the one life was a friend’s life and the ten were strangers? If no, why not?
The bit about a friend's life is for getting an idea of how much they value their tribe vs. those outside of it.
7. How much do you change when you know no one is around?
We all put on masks for different social situations. Sometimes those masks resemble who we are underneath and sometimes they don't. Hopefully this question will help you get a glimpse of who the person truly is.
8. How useful would you be in a zombie apocalypse?
I just thought this was a fun question. You could get any number of answers that might help you understand more about what kind of person they are. But mostly it's just because it's a fun question to answer.
9. How much do you know about the world outside your country?
This is a great one to see how much they pay attention to the broader world, but it can also be a good gauge of how nationalistic they are. It can also tell you where they think their focus should be, themselves, family, their community, their country, or humanity as a whole.
10. Which movie or book do you think is ridiculously overrated?
Not everyone rides the hype train. Find out more about what they like and if their interests coincide with your own.
11. Who would you most like to sit next to on a 10-hour flight and why?
I like this one because it's broad enough for them to pick a type of person (quiet or talkative) or a specific person (famous or influential individual). And either one they choose can tell you a lot about what they are interested in or what they value.
12. What are two things you know you should know how to do but don’t?
This is a fun question because you can commiserate if it's something you don't know how to do, joke if it's something silly, or learn more about them if it's something serious.
13. What is something you’ve done that you wish you could undo?
We all have regrets. With this question you can learn more about what they regret, but also what kind of values they consider important. Because, let's be honest, you probably wouldn't undo something you didn't think was important.
14. What do most people think about you that is absolutely not true?
Another one that attempts to get a look at who the person really is. It's up to the person whether their answer is about stereotypes, their public face, or gossip that has been spread about them.
15. What is something that can’t be taught and can only be learned with age?
This will hopefully lead to some thoughtful introspection. How much have they learned from their life so far and how much do they acknowledge the things they still don't know.
16. Do you think the convenience of technology is worth the loss of privacy that comes with it?
Technology plays a big part in this world of ours and it helps to think about the role it plays. Hopefully they will give you more than just a yes or a no for this question, but even if it is a one word answer you'll know how much they value their privacy.
17. What are the consequences of everyone having instant distraction at their fingertips?
How addicted to their phones are they? You can find that out. Plus you can find out if they think about how society functions or if they are mostly just focused on themselves.
18. What makes you say “What was I thinking?” when you look back on your life?
This question is great for bringing out some funny and embarrassing stories. Sharing a laugh over something embarrassing can be a great way to get closer to someone. You might also be able to gauge how seriously they take themselves.
19. If you could live your life again knowing what you do now, what would you change?
Similar to the earlier question undoing something in the past, but this one is aimed more at what they have learned from their mistakes. And how they would take advantage of all the knowledge they've gained.
20. You have $100 to burn, all your friends are busy and you have the whole day to yourself, what do you do?
This question is more about getting at what they really enjoy doing. You'll be able to see what their idea of a perfect day is and how much you both have in common when it comes to entertainment.
21. If you could be born again and choose what nationality, gender, and race to be, what would you choose?
Gender, race, and nationality are huge factors in society and individual lives. With this question, hopefully you'll be able to learn a little bit more about how they view these very important topics.
21 questions to get to know someone
For someone you just met or barely know. Easy to answer, but you still learn something.
22. What do you always end up explaining to people?
23. What do you happily spend money on that looks ridiculous to everyone else?
24. What have you tried once and immediately made part of your life?
25. What small thing do you have incredibly strong opinions about?
26. What do you always stop to look at?
27. What counts as being late in your family?
28. What subject makes you forget to let other people talk?
29. What errand can turn into a whole afternoon for you?
30. What compliment from a stranger has stuck with you?
31. What do you leave out when someone asks what you do?
32. What's worth getting up early for, in your opinion?
33. What have you been banned from?
34. What have you accidentally become qualified to do?
35. What did your family treat like contraband?
36. What have you been paid in besides money?
37. What did leaving home teach you about how your family lived?
38. What are you willing to be the unpopular person over?
39. What part of someone else's life have you tried and couldn't handle?
40. What would someone have to understand before going into business with you?
41. What have you signed up for without realizing what you were getting into?
42. What's the strangest thing you've been responsible for at work?
21 questions to ask your friends
For friends who already know too much about each other.
43. What opinion of mine have you been politely ignoring?
44. When did you realize you could stop being polite around me?
45. Which of my recommendations should I have to apologize for?
46. What have we made into a tradition without meaning to?
47. Which of my stories needs a witness before you'll believe it?
48. What could I talk you into that nobody else could?
49. What should we never be allowed to shop for together?
50. What advice do you give me that you never follow yourself?
51. What do I act like I invented?
52. Which of our unfinished plans still deserves a chance?
53. What have you blamed on me when I wasn't there?
54. What do we manage to argue about while agreeing with each other?
55. What have you learned about me from knowing my other friends?
56. What's the flimsiest excuse I've given you that you let slide?
57. What have I gotten better at that I haven't noticed?
58. Which version of me would my newer friends have trouble believing?
59. What have you been waiting for me to admit you were right about?
60. What have you talked your way into without an invitation?
61. When have you chosen a friend over fitting in?
62. When have you covered for a friend and regretted it?
63. How have you handled being friends with both sides of a breakup?
Flirty 21 questions to ask your crush
For a crush, a guy or a girl you're talking to, or the first few dates. A little flirty, nothing that will get you slapped.
64. What would you try to beat me at?
65. How does someone earn the right to steal food off your plate?
66. What do you get awkward about when you like someone?
67. What kind of teasing can you give but absolutely can't take?
68. What would you want us to be terrible at together?
69. What could go wrong on a date and make it better?
70. What do you think we'd disagree about in a grocery store?
71. What's something you'd enjoy teaching me, even if I was hopeless?
72. How do you like someone to handle a quiet moment?
73. What should I know before watching a movie with you?
74. What does trying too hard on a date look like to you?
75. What would you be curious to ask someone who knew me growing up?
76. What's the boldest thing you've said to someone you liked?
77. What completely ordinary thing have you mistaken for flirting?
78. What have you worn because you thought you'd run into someone?
79. How would you flirt with me if we didn't speak the same language?
80. What would you want to find out about us by traveling together?
81. What would you be giving up by starting something with me?
82. How would you want me to act around someone you used to date?
83. What's a risk you'd want me to take with you?
84. What have you noticed about me that you think I've missed?
21 questions for couples
For a boyfriend, girlfriend or partner you've been with a while. Questions you probably haven't asked yet.
85. What have we stopped explaining because we assume the other knows?
86. Which of my habits have you accidentally adopted?
87. What do we make look easy that took us forever to figure out?
88. What do I still ask your opinion on after I've clearly decided?
89. What do you miss about the way we used to talk?
90. What have I taken over that you'd like to do again?
91. What have we been calling temporary for a ridiculous amount of time?
92. What would you like me to brag about you for?
93. What do you wish I'd stop treating as a problem to solve?
94. What's your giveaway that I'm pretending to listen?
95. What would a week of doing everything your way look like?
96. What are we probably still going to be laughing about at eighty?
97. What purchase would you make if I couldn't veto it?
98. Which of my relatives could you survive a road trip with?
99. What would you want me to do if you got arrested?
100. What's the closest we've come to being thrown out of somewhere?
101. What did you learn about marriage from a couple who split up?
102. What did you agree to early on that you wouldn't agree to now?
103. When do you feel lonely even though I'm right there?
104. What decision about our future have we let other people make?
105. What do you hold back because you think I'll take it personally?
Deep 21 questions
Save these for later in the game, once the easy ones are out of the way.
106. Which family disagreement do you understand differently now?
107. What do you miss about a place you needed to leave?
108. What kind of help is hardest for you to accept?
109. What have you forgiven someone for but wouldn’t forgive yourself for?
110. When have you been grateful that someone told you no?
111. What did you stop arguing about without changing your mind?
112. Who gets the least patient version of you, and why?
113. What do you admire in someone you don't like?
114. What part of your life took longer because you wouldn't ask a simple question?
115. When did you realize you were the problem and not someone else?
116. What conversation changed where you lived?
117. What good news did you dread telling someone?
118. What did you spend years preparing for that never happened?
119. What have you stopped needing your parents to understand?
120. When did protecting yourself hurt someone who hadn't hurt you?
121. Whose disappointment have you learned you can live with?
122. What do you owe someone you no longer want in your life?
123. What belief would cost you the most to change?
124. What hardship made you less sympathetic to other people?
125. What did you only recognize as happiness after it ended?
126. What apology are you waiting for from someone who thinks everything's fine?
Funny and random 21 questions
Weird, random and a little gross. Good for when the game needs a laugh.
127. What household object have you threatened out loud?
128. What food makes you eat like someone might take it away?
129. Which animal would be unbearable if it could speak?
130. What smell do you recognize for an unfortunate reason?
131. What would you put in a vending machine to confuse people?
132. What have you done to escape after waving at someone who wasn't waving at you?
133. What have you Googled that a medieval peasant would judge you for?
134. What should come with a warning about how stupid you'll look using it?
135. What did you try to fix that now has a new problem?
136. What have you carried home that made strangers stare?
137. What tiny victory have you celebrated like you'd won a lawsuit?
138. What did you misunderstand so badly that people still bring it up?
139. What's the worst thing you've stepped in barefoot?
140. Which body part would be worst to have an extra one of?
141. What's the most undignified way you've gotten stuck?
142. What did a child say that made you feel personally attacked?
143. What have you accidentally glued together?
144. What have you eaten before realizing it wasn't food?
145. What have you done while trying to prove you were perfectly sober?
146. What insult about you would be hard to argue with?
147. What have you done that made someone say, "We can't take you anywhere"?
Juicy 21 questions
Secrets, confessions and the stuff people only admit in a game. Passes allowed.
148. What story do you tell with your worst part left out?
149. Who have you tried to impress while pretending you didn't care?
150. What have you done just to get the last word?
151. What have you kept because returning it would mean an awkward conversation?
152. What have you looked up about someone before meeting them?
153. What's the most work you've done to make something look accidental?
154. What secret did you give away without realizing it?
155. What bad idea did you encourage because you wanted to see what happened?
156. What favor have you done mainly to get a better favor back?
157. What have you paid to make disappear?
158. Whose relationship have you secretly hoped would end?
159. What's the cruelest thing you've said about a friend behind their back?
160. What does your family still think you never found out?
161. Who have you kept interested even though you didn't want them?
162. What have you lied about to get someone to lend you money?
163. Whose partner have you had a crush on?
164. What have you read that someone definitely meant to keep private?
165. What have you done that you judge your parents for doing?
166. When have you used someone's insecurity to win an argument?
167. Who do you resent for having a life you want?
168. What would someone here be angry to learn you told other people?
21 questions game over text
Good for playing over text. They're easy to answer in a message or a photo.
169. What item in your room would I have the most questions about?
170. What sticker or GIF is practically your signature?
171. Which saved link are you waiting for an excuse to send someone?
172. What could you draw from memory surprisingly well?
173. What's your best evidence that an animal disliked you?
174. What's the worst prize you've ever won?
175. What's the most ominous thing you could put in a fortune cookie?
176. Which word sounds like it should be an insult?
177. What have you made that looks like it survived a disaster?
178. What would you put in a care package for your worst enemy?
179. What have you almost asked me?
180. What would your oldest friend warn me not to challenge you to?
181. What's a sentence you never expected to say about your own life?
182. What would make you nervous about introducing me to your friends?
183. What have you wanted to say all day but had nobody to tell?
184. What's something you can say confidently now that you couldn't last year?
185. What do you find easy to tell strangers but hard to tell friends?
186. What would you want us to keep talking about after question 21?
187. What have you gotten attached to embarrassingly fast?
188. What have you stayed up all night doing that wasn't worth it?
189. Which photo on your phone would be hardest to explain to your grandparents?
Spicy 21 questions
For a partner or someone you're definitely flirting with. Spicy, not explicit.
190. What are you surprisingly picky about in someone you're seeing casually?
191. What makes someone fun to fool around with but terrible to date?
192. What changes about your flirting once things get physical?
193. What makes the morning after worth sticking around for?
194. What ordinary text would sound dirty coming from the right person?
195. What have you done for a romantic night that was a complete waste?
196. What's the most ridiculous advice you've been given about being sexy?
197. What makes a fling worth remembering years later?
198. How do you flirt with someone who already knows all your tricks?
199. What fantasy would you rather keep a fantasy?
200. How has your type surprised you?
201. What makes you jealous when you've agreed to keep things casual?
202. What do you miss most about being with someone when you're single?
203. What plans have you canceled because a date might turn into something more?
204. What would you hate for a partner to compare with an ex?
205. What have you wanted from a partner but struggled to ask for?
206. What do you wish a partner would take the lead on?
207. What should I wear when I want you thoroughly distracted?
208. What's the worst interruption you've had when things were getting interesting?
209. What innocent thing do I do that has a very different effect on you?
210. Where have you felt the most chemistry with someone while absolutely nothing was happening?
21 Questions PDF
Here is the link to the 21 Questions PDF, it has all the questions. Enjoy!
More questions you can use
Here are some other questions you can use for the 21 questions game. All have at least 21 questions and some have more than 21 questions which means you can pick and choose. Most of these can be used for guys or girls despite how they are labeled so you have more than enough questions to choose from.